‘Auntie, your bottom is sooooooooo big!’
‘It’s not that big Henry… I admit, it’s bigger than I’d like it to be… it's the medication I'm on... but… ok, it’s massive… erm… we don’t make personal remarks about people do we?’
‘Auntie, you do so many farts!’
‘Henry! I do not! That’s enough now… ‘
‘Auntie, I did a flatulence… GUFFAW!’
This delightful conversation took place as we were paying for our shopping at Asda today while Henry was enthusiastically smacking my bottom and roaring with laughter. The girl next to us gave me a sympathetic smile… I just laughed. What can you do eh? When a three year old decides to say it like it is, there’s nothing in the world that will dissuade him from his goal: Ultimate Public Humiliation.
At least he didn’t shout out ‘FUCKING HELL’ too, which is his other party piece at the moment. Small wins.
And to think, I’d just bought him a new bubble wand. Ungrateful little beast.